Shocking Revelation

The police totally overreacted to this kid's actions. Having said that, watching this self important spoiled asshole get zapped is satisfying on a a very base level that I am not proud of but can't resist expressing.

The Grant Miller Interview

The Benevolent and Honourable Site Master at Grant Miller Media
has seen fit to interview yours truly. After recently accusing him of plagiarism, I was a little concerned with how it would go. Thankfully, he didn't put the screws to me too hard.

GM: You lived/worked in DeKalb and seem to know many the same people I know
from there. But I'm unsure we've ever met in real life. Have we and I'm
just an asshole for forgetting?

MoF: We have probably met but I was a bartender at the Annex and there is a good chance that one or both of us were drunk at the time. Your pic looks vaguely familiar but boozin' don't make for good face recognizin'.

GM: You once commented that your dad was a drummer. If so, did he still want
to work? Or did he prefer just banging on the drum all day?

MoF: Aside from banging on his drums, my dad worked on growing his hair and
moustache. I have often described my dad as looking just like Derek Smalls from Spinal Tap. He also did a lot of laundry for his six filthy kids.

GM: Your TV has only two channels. One channel is all politics all the time.
The other is just cooking shows. What do you do?

MoF: I am a sales manager (yeah, I know it's boring). I used to cook at a
fancy ass resturant but after I got divorced I realized that I was not
going to build any mansions on a chef's salary. I headed back to the
office to avoid living in a refrigerator box in the alley. Of course, it
would be a Sub Zero box and the alley would be behind Bloomingdale's. I
got standards.

GM: You live in Chicago. Is Chicago a great city or the greatest city and
why?

MoF: I like to think it is the greatest city because I am vain and refuse to
believe my choice to live here could be anything but pure genious. When
the wind comes clipping off the lake in the middle of January I question my judgement a little. Then I get home and chow on some hot pierogi I bought from the Polish market up the street from me and everything is all better.

GM: Why should people read your blog?

MoF: Because work is boring and sometimes I am not. Also, I never post pictures of kittens or hamsters and dumb shit like that. Take that www.hamstersphoto.com! You suck!

If you would like to be interviewed by me, let me know

Don Imus-t Be Retarded

The title of this post is about all that needs to be said. Don is an old man who should not be fired because he is a racist but because he is boring and a fossil. I sometimes catch his show on MSNBC once in a while and it is pretty lame. And let's get rid of the cowboy hat. What kind of an asshole wears a cowboy hat to do a radio show in their New York studio? What a dick.

An Interesting Walk

I was in the mood to paint today so I decided to scoot on over to the nearest art supply store I could find (thanks Google) and was caught in the rain. I quickly took cover under the awning of a nearby building. After a few seconds I smelled smoke. I thought, "Please don't let my sanctuary be on fire." I turned around and realized that the doorway I was in led to a restaurant called Honey1 BBQ. Seeing as I had to wait out the storm and have been taking pretty good care of myself lately, I decided to treat myself to a cholesterol festival.

I looked at the menu and decided to go for the old stand by and my gold standard of barbecue, the pulled pork sandwich. They serve their's with slaw and sauce and it is awesome. I liked it so much that I ate all my fries because I wanted to savor every last bit of that sauce. Superb. Get over there if you can.

Once I got to the art store I was really happy. It is called http://artsupply.com/ so I guess they do mostly online business but they have a very friendly staff that will help you with anything. They have the cheapest prices for art supplies in the city that I have found.

Finally, I wanted to mention something that became apparent to me on my trip. I was wearing my sweats when I left the house. I had not shaved, and had just finished cleaning the house. I was kinda scruffy at best and maybe a little smelly. On my way to my destination, people tended to look at me with disfavor and maybe thought I was a bum or something. I completely understand that since I was maybe a little ripe at the time. No big deal

Thing is, on my way back (now with a little BBQ sauce added to my costume) with a canvas and a sack of paints, people started asking me about what I was working on. Strangers! I had been transformed from a dirt bag to an eccentric artist just because of the things I was carrying. It's like the time I saw a guy in the grocery store with mud sprayed all over his back and thought, "What a shitbag." Later I saw a bike helmet in his cart and knew why he was dirty and why I was a judgmental asshole.

Evidence That I Am An Old Jaded Prick (like you needed any)

I was walking to the library on Saturday and came across some folks trying to pass out copies of The Socialist Worker newspaper. When I got within earshot, they started giving me their pitch. I waved my hand at them and said, "Socialism only works in art school." and kept walking.

After walking a few more blocks, I started to feel bad. I used to BE a socialist. I used to think that people (given the right set of rules) could take care of everyone without being corrupt. I was a kid that had ideals for society that were lofty to be sure but also founded on a belief in my fellow man. What an asshole I am. I still think the "art school" remark was funny. That makes me a huge asshole.

When I got to the library, I got a biography of Ben Franklin. Maybe that makes up for it.